Day in the life of a Filipina Nurse Practitioner

Day in the Life of a Nurse Practitioner in San Francisco: Healing & Hitting 4.5K Watch Hours

12.03.2026

Morning Reflections in San Francisco

Good morning, everyone. Today began like many mornings here in San Francisco—cold, crisp, and quiet in a way that feels peaceful. The air had that familiar chill, but the sky looked clear and beautiful. As I stood outside waiting for my ride to work, I could hear the birds chirping in the distance. It reminded me so much of my mornings in the Philippines, when I would wake up early for my routines, surrounded by warm sunlight and the sounds of nature beginning the day. Even though I’m far from there now, moments like this bring those memories back in the most comforting way.

As I waited for my ride, I took a moment to reflect. I was tired—like I often am in the mornings—but I reminded myself of the same affirmation I repeat every day: It’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous, amazing, and simply be myself. I try not to worry about everything all at once. Instead, I focus on breathing deeply and letting things go. Life can feel overwhelming sometimes, but taking those few quiet moments before the day begins helps ground me.

A Milestone I Didn’t Expect So Soon

Something incredible happened recently—I reached 4.5K watch hours on YouTube. Even saying it out loud still feels surreal. It hasn’t fully hit me yet because it hasn’t reflected in my earnings dashboard, but I know it’s real. I started my YouTube journey back in June 2025, and after about nine months, I finally reached that milestone. What’s even more amazing is that the current version of my channel really restarted in December, so in many ways it feels like everything happened in just three months.

I’m so grateful to everyone who watched my yoga video and continued watching my other videos afterward. That video really seemed to open the door for people to discover my channel. If you’ve ever related to my stories about burnout, healing, or rediscovering yourself, then you already know why I make these videos. They’re not just vlogs—they’re reflections, meditations, and pieces of my life that I’m sharing honestly.

For a long time, I struggled with being a people pleaser. I often put everyone else first and forgot to choose myself. I think many of us go through that phase in life. Now, I’m learning what it means to reset, to rediscover who I am, and to start choosing myself more intentionally.

Lunch Break in the Park

By lunchtime, the busy morning of video visits was finally over. It had been one of those nonstop clinic mornings, but I made it through. I packed a simple lunch today—rice and carne asada from Trader Joe’s—and stepped outside to enjoy the sunshine.

The weather has been absolutely gorgeous the past few days, and it reminded me how important it is to step outside and breathe fresh air. If you’re in San Francisco or anywhere in California right now, this is your reminder to get outside and enjoy the sun for a bit.

While sitting in the park, I started thinking about the idea of taking another vacation this summer. I technically have flexible time off—what some people call “unlimited PTO.” But sometimes I wonder if it really is unlimited. What if I take too much time? What if someone says something? My colleague told me to just go for it. If the time is there, I should use it. And honestly, they’re probably right.

Sometimes we overthink things instead of allowing ourselves to enjoy the benefits that are already available to us.

Purpose, Pressure, and Letting Go

Being a nurse practitioner is deeply meaningful work. I truly believe in serving my patients and helping my community. At the same time, the emotional weight of healthcare can be heavy. It’s impossible to please everyone, and there will always be someone who leaves unhappy.

What I’m learning is that my responsibility is to do my best—to listen, provide care, and help connect people to the resources they need. If someone ultimately feels they would receive better care somewhere else, then my role is to help guide them there. Healthcare should always center on what’s best for the patient.

Letting go of the pressure to be perfect has been one of the hardest lessons, but also one of the most freeing.

Healing Old Wounds

I’ve also been processing some personal grief related to a friendship that faded away. For months, I felt hurt because someone I cared about disappeared without explanation. Being ghosted can be incredibly painful, especially when you already carry abandonment wounds.

Recently, he finally texted me. He said he didn’t have the emotional capacity to talk right now. Surprisingly, that message gave me a sense of closure. It showed that he still respected me enough to respond, even if it took months.

I still care about him, and I still wish him happiness. Even if I’m no longer part of his life, I truly hope he’s doing well. Sometimes love simply means letting people go and cheering for them from afar.

Choosing Health and Growth

Lately, I’ve been focusing more intentionally on my health and healing. This includes meditation, walking more often, and becoming more mindful about what I eat. Instead of taking rides everywhere, I’ve been walking home whenever I can. It’s a small change, but it feels like progress.

I’m hoping to join the gym soon and start exercising regularly again. My goals are simple: move more, eat healthier, and take better care of myself physically and mentally.

At the same time, I’m trying to save money so I can eventually build a house in the Philippines. That dream has been on my heart for a long time, and maybe—just maybe—this growing YouTube channel will help support that vision once monetization kicks in.

Dreams for the Future

Looking ahead, I’m excited about the possibilities. I’ll be turning 38 this May, and I’ve been reflecting a lot about where I want my life to go next. By the time I’m 41, I’ll have six years of experience as a nurse practitioner, which means I may be able to practice without physician supervision. That could open the door to starting my own telehealth practice someday.

But life has a funny way of unfolding differently than we plan. Maybe that path will happen, or maybe my journey will evolve into something else entirely—like content creation, storytelling, travel, and sharing authentic life experiences with the world.

Right now, I’m learning to trust both my faith in God and the flow of the universe. I believe that I’m exactly where I’m supposed to be in this moment, and wherever I’m meant to go next will reveal itself in time.

Gratitude for This Journey

Creating these videos has become more than a hobby—it’s become a source of joy and purpose. Sharing my healing journey, my struggles, my growth, and my everyday life has helped me reconnect with myself.

To everyone who watches, comments, shares, or simply listens—thank you. Thank you for seeing me, for allowing me to be authentic, and for supporting this journey.

Ending the Day with Simple Joy

After work, I came home and took our little dog, Dots, out for a walk. The evening air was still beautiful, and the sky had that soft golden glow that makes San Francisco feel magical.

Sometimes the best way to end the day is with something simple—a walk, fresh air, and the reminder that life doesn’t have to be complicated.

So wherever you are today, take a moment to step outside, breathe deeply, and remind yourself:

It’s a beautiful day to be gorgeous, amazing, and fully yourself.
A Little Delulu, A Lot of Gratitude: A Day in the Life of a Nurse Practitioner in San Francisco

11.03.2026

March 2026

Hi everyone. Good morning.

We are on our way to work.

Today I’m taking you along for another day in the life of a nurse practitioner in San Francisco, California. The mornings have been feeling a little lighter lately. Maybe it’s the sunshine, maybe it’s the mindset shift, or maybe it’s just choosing to start the day by reminding myself:

It’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous.

That little phrase started as something playful in my vlogs, but it has slowly become part of my daily mindset practice. Sometimes you have to speak positivity into existence, even when your brain wants to spiral into overthinking.

And if you’ve been following my YouTube journey, you already know — I’m a chronic overthinker.

But before we get into that… we made it.

4.1K watch hours.

You guys… I cannot believe it.

The YouTube Journey (A Little Delulu… But Maybe Not)

I started my YouTube journey back in June 2025. At that time, I had a different channel. Life happened, things changed, and eventually I had to abandon that channel. It’s still out there somewhere on the internet with a few videos, but I stopped posting on it.

Starting over wasn’t easy.

But in December 2025, I made a decision.

I started a new channel:
Filipino Nurse Practitioner Diaries.

And I made one promise to myself:

Post daily. Show up authentically. Say the mantra.

“It’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous.”

That phrase became a small daily reminder to stay positive, focus on what I can control, and stop letting my thoughts run wild with anxiety.

Because if I’m being completely honest — overthinking has always been one of my biggest struggles.

Learning to Manage Anxiety

In many of my recent vlogs, I’ve talked about how my mind tends to spiral.

I overthink situations.
I overanalyze conversations.
I question whether I’m doing enough.

And sometimes that turns into anxiety.

But lately, I’ve been trying to slow down and actually observe those feelings instead of ignoring them.

I’m learning to recognize when stress is creeping in and taking a step back.

That’s why I’ve been more intentional about things like:

• Taking actual lunch breaks
• Stepping outside for fresh air
• Going for walks
• Practicing meditation
• Doing yoga

Even just five minutes of deep breathing in the morning helps me reset before heading into a busy clinic day.

Many of you have sent me messages saying that hearing me talk openly about burnout, mental health, and imposter syndrome as a nurse practitioner has helped you feel less alone.

And honestly, that means everything to me.

Because the truth is — I still feel anxious sometimes.

Imposter Syndrome as a Nurse Practitioner

Even now, working as a nurse practitioner, I sometimes feel that little voice in my head saying:

“Do you really know enough?”

That’s imposter syndrome.

But I’ve learned that being a good clinician doesn’t mean knowing everything.

It means:

• Being willing to learn
• Asking questions
• Consulting colleagues
• Admitting when you don’t know something

Medicine is a team sport.

And I think recognizing our limits actually makes us better providers and safer clinicians.

Being Honest About My Body Right Now

Another thing I want to be honest about — my physical health.

After my recent trip to the Philippines, I gained some weight.

And you know what?

I don’t regret it.

While I was there, I let go of a lot of stress. I let go of dieting, expectations, and restrictions. I just enjoyed the moment, spent time with family, and ate the food that reminds me of home.

Filipino food will always have my heart.

But now that I’m back, I’m trying to find balance again.

Not extreme dieting.
Not punishing workouts.

Just moderation.

More walks.
More yoga.
More mindfulness.

I actually recorded a yoga session yesterday, but when I watched the footage back… I didn’t feel confident enough to post it.

And that’s me being completely honest.

Sometimes our self-image is influenced by what we think a “healthy” person is supposed to look like.

Right now, I’m still working through that.

But this vlog — and this blog — is about being raw and authentic.

So this is me.

Lunchtime Diaries

Good afternoon everyone.

We’re doing lunchtime diaries at the park today.

It has been a busy morning at work, and I also did an interview today for a pre-operative nurse practitioner position.

The interview was actually really chill. It was more informational than anything else, and I learned more about what the position would look like.

But now I’m in a bit of a reflective space.

I’m not sure if it’s the right fit.

There might be a group interview coming up, so I have to decide if I even want to move forward with the process.

And honestly?

I think I already know my answer.

My Dream Job

Right now I work in primary care with a focus on HIV care, LGBTQ+ care, and gender-affirming care.

And I genuinely love what I do.

This is actually my dream job.

So when I started thinking about potentially leaving, I had a moment where I asked myself:

“Why would I walk away from something I worked so hard to get?”

And the truth is — I don’t think I want to.

Sometimes opportunities show up not because you’re meant to take them, but because they’re meant to help you realize how grateful you are for what you already have.

Trader Joe’s Lunch Break

Today’s lunch is pesto chicken pasta.

Super simple.

The chicken is from Trader Joe’s — it’s already pre-marinated, so I just had to cook it. Easy meal prep.

Lately I’ve also noticed that I’ve been feeling hungrier than usual, which might just be my body recalibrating after travel.

And honestly?

This pasta is really good.

Also, important question of the day:

Which one is better? With glasses or without glasses?

Unfortunately I need my glasses to read… but right now I’m just enjoying the sunshine and taking slow deep breaths.

My Delulu Moment

Last night I had a little delulu moment.

I started thinking:

“What if I actually get monetized soon?”

And then this morning I checked my YouTube analytics.

4.1K watch hours.

Which means that within the next few days, once everything is verified, I should be eligible to apply for YouTube monetization.

And for a second I thought:

“Wait… is this actually happening?”

Maybe I’m not delulu after all.

Maybe believing in yourself — even when things feel uncertain — actually matters.

Maybe the message matters.

Maybe the story matters.

And maybe showing up every day as your authentic self is enough.

What’s Next

Moving forward, I want to be more intentional with my content.

More:

• Yoga videos
• Wellness routines
• Honest nurse practitioner diaries
• Mental health conversations
• Lifestyle and balance

I’m also thinking about taking actual yoga classes so I can learn proper technique and improve my practice.

I haven’t signed up for a gym yet.

I haven’t booked the classes yet.

But I will.

I’m just slowly building the motivation and energy to get there.

Especially since I’m going to Hawaii in a couple of weeks.

So maybe for now I’ll continue with my DIY yoga sessions at home until my schedule settles down.

Gratitude

To everyone watching my vlogs, reading these entries, sending messages, and sharing your own stories with me:

Thank you.

Your support means more than you know.

And if you’re also navigating anxiety, burnout, career decisions, or self-doubt — just know that you’re not alone in that process.

We’re all figuring it out one day at a time.

And remember:

It’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous. 🌞
March 9, 2026 | Learning to Listen to My Body While Navigating Work, Purpose, and Rest

11.03.2026

A Tired Morning and a Beautiful Day

Today is March 9th, 2026, and it’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous, stunning, amazing, and happy—even if the day started with exhaustion.

This morning began while I waited for my Waymo ride to work. The weather looked like it was going to be gorgeous, and I could hear the birds chirping around me. Normally that would feel peaceful, but today I mostly just felt tired. The kind of tired that doesn’t go away after a full night of sleep.

Lately I’ve been sleeping a lot, yet waking up feeling drained. It’s starting to make me wonder if something else is going on with my body. Maybe it’s something simple like vitamin D deficiency, especially living in San Francisco where sunshine isn’t always guaranteed.

I think it’s time to schedule a checkup and run some labs just to understand what’s going on.

Looking Forward to Hawaii and Some Sunshine

One thing I’m really looking forward to is my upcoming trip to Hawaii at the end of March for a conference.

The conference runs in the mornings—from around 7 AM to 11 AM—which means I’ll have the rest of the day free. I’m imagining myself spending that time at the beach, soaking in the sun, doing yoga, stretching, and simply resting.

Maybe that sunshine will give me the vitamin D and reset that my body seems to be craving right now.

Daylight Savings and the Struggle to Wake Up

Today was also the first morning after daylight savings, and I definitely felt it.

When the clock said 7:48 AM, my body felt like it was 6:48 AM. That one-hour shift made it surprisingly difficult to wake up. I ended up running a little late, but thankfully I wasn’t too worried about it.

Sometimes you just have to move through the morning slowly and trust that your energy will catch up later.

Reconnecting With My Body

During my commute, I started reflecting on how disconnected I’ve been from my body lately.

I haven’t been going to the gym or practicing yoga the way I used to. Yoga, especially, has always helped me slow down and understand what my body is trying to communicate.

It teaches breathing, awareness, and patience.

Right now I think that’s exactly what I need. If I can start moving my body again—whether through yoga, stretching, or light workouts—I know it will help boost those endorphins and happy hormones.

And once those start flowing, everything else tends to follow.

The Inner Battle With Body Image

Another truth I’ve been facing lately is how I feel about my body.

Sometimes I struggle to even look at myself in the mirror. It’s strange because logically, I know that I’m beautiful. I know that I’m gorgeous. But sometimes there are these negative voices that creep into my mind and tell me otherwise.

It’s painful when that happens.

But I’m reminding myself that confidence often comes from action. Taking care of my health, moving my body, and nurturing myself will slowly rebuild that relationship with my body again.

Daily Vlogging and Finding Balance

I’ve been posting daily vlogs for a while now, but yesterday I didn’t vlog because I spent the entire day driving from San Diego back to San Francisco.

It was a long drive, and the person I was with isn’t comfortable being recorded. I wanted to respect that.

Skipping a day made me realize something important: maybe I don’t have to vlog every single day.

Creating content has been meaningful for me, but I also want to respect my energy, my privacy, and the people around me. Moving forward, I might shift to one or two vlogs per week instead of daily uploads.

Sometimes balance is more sustainable than consistency.

Lunch Diaries at the Park

Later in the afternoon, I stepped outside for lunch at the park.

The weather was beautiful—sunny, bright, and full of people enjoying the day. I love seeing people outside, walking around, talking with friends, or just sitting in the sun.

For lunch, I had leftovers from our San Diego trip: beef broccoli with rice.

I wasn’t very hungry, but I reminded myself that food is still important for energy. After having coffee and sitting in the sunshine for a bit, I started to feel more awake.

Sometimes the smallest things—sunlight, fresh air, and a warm meal—can make a huge difference.

Gratitude for My Growing YouTube Community

I also want to say how grateful I am for everyone who has been watching, liking, commenting, and sharing my videos.

My watch hours are slowly growing, and even though the growth feels gradual, I can see the progress happening over time. That makes me really happy.

Some people have suggested that I start a Patreon, which is definitely something I’ve thought about. But I don’t think I’m quite there yet. I want to continue growing the community organically before taking that step.

Still, it’s exciting to know that people are connecting with the content.

Checking My Health and Running Labs

Because of the fatigue I’ve been feeling, I’ve also scheduled a doctor’s appointment to check my labs.

It’s been a while since I last checked them, and it feels like the responsible thing to do. Sometimes our bodies send subtle signals when something needs attention.

Instead of ignoring it, I want to listen.

Career Anxiety and the Big Interview

Another thing weighing on my mind right now is an upcoming job interview.

It’s with a company that I once considered my dream company. But lately, the thought of the interview has been giving me anxiety. I haven’t had much time to prepare, and now I’m questioning whether I should move forward with it or withdraw my application.

Part of me wonders if it’s an opportunity I shouldn’t miss.

Another part of me wonders if protecting my peace is more important right now.

Overthinking at its finest.

Unlimited PTO — What Does It Really Mean?

Something else I’ve been thinking about is the concept of unlimited PTO.

Technically, my current role offers flex time, and it’s supposed to allow for more flexibility with travel and time off. But I’m still trying to understand how flexible it actually is.

Many companies say they offer unlimited PTO, but there can still be unspoken expectations. You might technically be allowed to take time off, but there’s always that quiet question in the back of your mind:

How much is too much?

I want to travel more. I want to take time to recharge. But I’m also aware of how workplace culture can shape how comfortable people feel actually using those benefits.

So the question still lingers in my mind:

Unlimited PTO… what does it really mean?

Dreaming About Future Travel

Beyond Hawaii, I’ve been thinking about future trips too.

I’d love to take a vacation later this year—maybe in the fall or winter. One place that keeps calling my name is Japan. I want to redo my trip there properly and also visit my brother, my nephew, and my niece.

That thought alone brings me a lot of joy.

Ending the Day With a Walk

Before heading home, I made a promise to myself: if the weather was nice, I would walk instead of rushing back.

So I did.

I walked slowly, enjoying the sunshine and the calmness of the day. Sometimes healing doesn’t come from big breakthroughs or dramatic changes.

Sometimes healing looks like:

A quiet walk.
A warm meal.
Birds chirping in the morning.
Sunlight on your face.

And learning how to listen to your body again.

Today, that felt like enough. ✨
Home, Memories, and a San Diego Sunset

08.03.2026

Healing Journey Diaries — March 7, 2026

Back Home in San Diego

After the long drive from Northern California, we finally made it back to San Diego, to the house where I grew up. Walking into this home always brings a wave of memories. The house was recently renovated about a year ago, so it looks a little nicer now, a little more updated. But even with the renovations, it still holds the same feeling of familiarity and history.

This house represents the beginning of our life in the United States. When we first moved here from the Philippines, I was only ten years old. We didn’t come from much, and this small home held many people and many stories.

Back then, this room I’m sitting in now was shared between my mom and me. Another room belonged to my grandparents, Nana and Tatai. The third room was shared by my uncle, my aunt, and my two cousins. It was a full house—very typical of many Filipino families where multiple generations live together under one roof.

Looking around now, the room has turned into more of a storage space, but the memories are still here. It reminds me how far we’ve come.

Family Moments in the Kitchen

When we arrived, the house was already lively. My mom was eating Panda Express while my brother started cooking fish balls he bought from Island Pacific, a Filipino grocery store that carries so many nostalgic foods from home.

The kitchen smelled like comfort and familiarity. My mom had also brought dried fish from the Philippines, something she managed to pack in her luggage. These small things—food, smells, flavors—connect us to our roots.

My brother was experimenting with the fish balls, frying them up and serving them with sauce. I tried some and realized that I actually liked them better with simple suka (vinegar). The fish balls themselves were already rich, so the vinegar balanced it out perfectly.

And of course, our little Dottie—Dots—was nearby, mostly interested in food and patiently waiting for someone to drop something.

Gifts from Japan

My brother recently came back from Japan, where he is stationed with the U.S. Navy as a corpsman. He just received a promotion, which we are all incredibly proud of.

He brought back some small gifts for me, including snacks and drinks from Japan. There was Sakura latte, matcha drinks, Pocky, and other treats, along with a cute shirt and even a viral Japanese soap shaped like pizza.

Most of the snacks will probably go to my co-workers, because I love sharing little things like that with the team at work.

It’s funny to think that we came home with almost nothing when we first arrived in this country, and now we’re exchanging gifts from places like Japan. Life really does change in unexpected ways.

Walking Through Old Memories

Later in the afternoon, we decided to go out for a walk with my mom, my brother, and the dogs. It was such a beautiful day—sunny, clear, and around 70 degrees, the kind of weather San Diego is famous for.

We drove toward Seaport Village, taking the scenic route through downtown. As we drove past familiar streets, I started remembering how often I used to come here years ago. When friends would visit, this was one of the places I loved to bring them for long walks along the water.

San Diego has changed so much since then. There are new restaurants, new buildings, and so many new developments. But the waterfront still feels peaceful and timeless.

Sunset at Seaport Village

When we arrived, the waterfront was already filling with people waiting for the sunset. The San Diego skyline stretched across the horizon, and the Coronado Bridge stood beautifully in the distance.

It felt calm and quiet in that moment. People were taking photos, walking along the path, or simply sitting and watching the sky slowly change colors.

We were lucky enough to find parking—something that always feels like a miracle near the waterfront. Once we parked, we walked around with the dogs, enjoying the breeze and the peaceful energy of the harbor.

Sometimes the simplest moments—walking by the water, feeling the sun, watching the sky—are the ones that bring the most clarity.

Seeing San Diego in a New Light

As the sun started to set, the sky turned shades of orange and gold. The water reflected the light, and everything looked almost unreal.

Standing there, I realized that I was seeing San Diego in a completely different way than before. When I lived here years ago, I didn’t always notice the beauty the same way. Now, after living in other cities and going through so many life experiences, I can appreciate it more deeply.

San Diego really does feel like one of the most beautiful cities in the country.

A Simple, Beautiful Day

By the time we walked back to the car, it was already evening. The air was still warm, and the city lights were starting to come on. Tomorrow the clocks will move forward for daylight saving time, marking the beginning of spring.

It was just a short trip—only one night in San Diego—but it felt meaningful.

Being back in this house, walking through the neighborhoods I grew up in, and spending time with my family reminded me of how much life can change over time.

And yet, some things remain the same:
family, memories, and the feeling of home.

Quiet Reflections

Back in my old room later that evening, I sat quietly for a moment. I felt exhausted from the drive, from the week, and from everything that’s been happening lately.

But I also felt grateful.

Grateful that I survived difficult seasons.
Grateful that I can come back here and remember where I started.
Grateful that life continues to move forward.

Maybe later I’ll do a short yoga session or meditation, just to reconnect with my body and breathe.

For now, I’m just letting myself rest.

Because sometimes the most healing thing we can do…
is simply come home. ✨
March 5, 2026 — Jet Lag, Showing Up, and Walking Through San Francisco

07.03.2026

Good morning, everyone.

Today is March 5th, 2026, and it’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous, stunning, amazing, and alive.

This morning started the same way the past few days have started: tired, jetlagged, and slowly trying to wake up. I’m currently on my way to work, doing my usual little morning reflection while the city is just beginning to come alive. The sun was starting to come out, and even though my body still feels like it’s on another time zone, the light outside reminded me that today is still a gift.

I arrived back in San Francisco Sunday evening around 8 PM from my trip, and honestly, I don’t think my body has fully recovered yet. I unpacked a little that night but didn’t fall asleep until around 11 PM. Since then, I’ve been working every day. Today marks my fourth day back at work, and the jet lag is still very real.

This morning I woke up with a headache, and my body just feels heavy. I’m hoping I’m not getting sick. I might just take some Tylenol and take the day slowly. Some days aren’t about thriving — sometimes they’re just about showing up and doing your best with what you have.

Today is going to be a busy clinic day. I have around twenty patients scheduled, which means the day will move quickly whether I’m ready or not. We also have a meeting later this afternoon, so there probably won’t be much downtime.

But we’re here.
We’re showing up.

And that counts for something.

Jet Lag Is Real

I honestly didn’t expect the jet lag to hit me this hard. I thought after a few days I’d feel normal again, but my body clearly disagrees.

On Monday, I was so exhausted that I actually forgot my Nike jacket in my Waymo ride home. I was so sad when I realized it because I had just bought that jacket less than two months ago and really liked it. Now I’m back to wearing my old reliable jacket — the one that somehow shows up in all my videos.

It’s funny how little things like that remind you how tired your brain actually is.

I’ve also been thinking about getting back into yoga, but right now I just need sleep. Real sleep. The kind where your body finally resets.

A Long Day at Work

The day ended up being just as busy as expected. I saw 19 patients, and by the time the afternoon came around, I could really feel the exhaustion in my body.

Some days in healthcare are like that.
You give your energy to everyone else all day long.

But somehow we made it through.

By the time work ended, I was completely drained. But instead of calling a ride home, I decided to walk.

Part of it was practical — the ride was going to take longer than usual — but part of it was also a promise I made to myself. I told myself that when the weather is nice, I should try to walk more and move my body.

So today, I kept that promise.

Walking Through the Castro

Walking home gave me a chance to slow down and actually look around.

I live near the Castro District in San Francisco, and during the daytime it feels completely different than the nightlife people usually associate it with. The streets were quiet, the air was cool, and the neighborhood felt peaceful.

There were trees, murals, flowers, and sunlight spilling between the buildings.

San Francisco has always been a city full of art. Murals appear on walls where you least expect them, adding color and personality to everyday streets. As I walked, I passed the local market, a few bars that are usually busy at night, and some restaurants I love.

There’s also a French restaurant nearby that I once took my boyfriend to. He’s French, so I thought it would be fitting. Little memories like that appear as you walk past familiar places.

It made the walk feel nostalgic in a way.

A Different Era of Life

The Castro is known for its nightlife, but these days I’m not really part of that world anymore.

There was a time when I used to go out more. But life feels different now.

I’ve been in what I like to call my “softness era.”

Less chaos.
Less nightlife.
More reflection.

More quiet.

After my recent trip and everything I’ve been processing emotionally, I can feel that I still have healing to do, especially when it comes to my mental health and my tendency to overthink.

But healing isn’t linear.

Some days you feel strong.
Some days you’re just tired and walking home after a long day.

And both are okay.

Ending the Day

By the time I reached home, I was completely exhausted.

Jet lag is still lingering. My body aches, and I’m hoping I’m not coming down with something. But I’m also reminding myself that I’ve done a lot in the past few days — traveling across the world, returning to work, and trying to re-adjust to everyday life again.

Tomorrow will be another busy day.

And after work, I’ll actually be driving to San Diego, so tonight I need to do a little planning and maybe clean the house before leaving.

Life keeps moving.

But for now, I’m grateful for small things:

A sunny San Francisco afternoon.
A quiet walk home.
And another day where I showed up, even when I was tired.

Sometimes that’s more than enough.

— Jasmine 🌿
Healing, Rest, and the Road to San Diego — Reflection Diaries (March 6, 2026)

07.03.2026

Morning Reflections: Heading to Work

Good morning, loves. Today is March 6, 2026, and it’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous, stunning, and amazing. The morning began quietly as I waited for my ride to work in the chilly San Francisco air. The city was waking up around me—cars passing by, people rushing into their day, and the familiar sounds of a busy morning.

I’m still feeling the effects of jet lag from my recent trip, and my body has been asking for rest. My muscles ache, and I keep finding myself wishing for one long stretch of uninterrupted sleep. But even through the exhaustion, I remind myself that healing sometimes means showing up anyway.

This morning I also had to make sure I took my anxiety medication. Yesterday I forgot, and by the afternoon my eyes started getting blurry. It was a reminder that caring for my mental health is part of my daily routine now. Healing isn’t just emotional—it’s also the small, responsible choices we make every day.

Planning a Moment of Rest: Hawaii

Even though I’m tired, I had something exciting happen today. I finally booked my flight to Hawaii, completed my registration for the conference, and secured my stay. When I checked my bank account afterward, it wasn’t the most pleasant sight. The trip is about $700 over my budget, but thankfully most of the expenses will be reimbursed later.

Still, I’m choosing to see this trip as something important for myself. Hawaii represents rest, sunshine, and emotional reset. There’s something about being near the ocean that makes me feel lighter. Standing by the water, feeling the warmth of the sun, and hearing the waves has always helped me reconnect with myself.

Sometimes we need to intentionally create space to slow down and breathe.

A Commitment to My Health

Over the next couple of weeks, I want to recommit to my physical and mental health. I promised myself—and many of you who watch my videos—that I would start doing more yoga, stretching, and wellness routines again.

Movement has always been grounding for me. Yoga especially helps me reconnect with my body and calm my mind. This second phase of my healing journey is about rebuilding my relationship with my health. It won’t happen overnight, but I’m committed to starting again.

Understanding My Relationship with My Mom

One of the most challenging parts of my recent trip to the Philippines was reflecting on my relationship with my mom. Healing sometimes means confronting difficult truths and accepting realities we may not be able to change.

I’ve come to realize that my mom may never communicate the way I hope she would—and that’s okay. Instead of trying to change her, I want to focus on understanding her better.

What matters most is that she is the most important person in my life right now. When I say that I’m afraid of losing her, it’s a fear that sits deeply in my heart. Saying it out loud reminds me to appreciate the moments we do have together.

Moving forward, my intention is to approach our relationship with more patience, kindness, and understanding.

A Day in the Life: More Than My Job

Through my videos and blog, I want to show that life is more than just a career. Yes, I’m a nurse practitioner, and that’s a huge part of my identity. But I’m also a daughter, a sister, a partner, and a very proud dog parent.

My life may not look perfect, but it is real. I’m learning to live authentically and intentionally.

One of my biggest dreams is to build a house in the Philippines within the next year or two. Eventually, I hope to turn that home into a peaceful yoga retreat and small bed-and-breakfast in the mountains—a place where people can come to rest, heal, and reconnect with themselves.

Lunchtime Diaries: A Moment of Peace

During my lunch break, I stepped outside to a nearby park to enjoy the fresh air and sunshine. The temperature was around 67 degrees, which felt perfect—not too hot, not too cold.

I didn’t bring lunch today because I knew I’d be driving to San Diego after work. Instead, I spent my break doing some light stretching, breathing deeply, and enjoying nature. Sometimes stepping away from screens and responsibilities for even a few minutes can make a big difference.

Lately, I’ve also noticed more messages and views coming through on my YouTube channel. It means so much to see people connecting with the videos. I read your messages, even if I can’t always respond right away. Knowing that my simple daily vlogs resonate with people gives me motivation to keep sharing.

Remembering the Hard Times

As I sat in the park, I started thinking about Dots—my little Dottie—who we’re picking up tomorrow in San Diego. She’s more than just a dog to me. She’s truly my companion.

During the darkest days of COVID, when I was working as an ICU nurse and people were understandably afraid to be around healthcare workers, life felt incredibly isolating. Many people kept their distance, and loneliness became part of everyday life.

But Dottie stayed with me through it all. She gave me comfort, companionship, and a reason to keep moving forward during one of the most difficult periods of my life.

I give her a lot of credit for helping me survive that time. But I also remind myself that I survived because I chose to keep going.

The Road to San Diego

After finishing work, we began the long drive down to San Diego. The full trip can take eight to ten hours, so we decided not to rush it. Instead, we stopped halfway for the night in Lebec, California, staying at a small hotel to rest before continuing the journey tomorrow.

Sometimes the best way to travel is to take it slowly.

Tomorrow we’ll finish the drive—and finally reunite with Dots, my little bundle of joy.

Gratitude for the Present Moment

Today reminded me that life’s beauty often lies in the simple moments—sunlight on your skin, fresh air, deep breaths, and quiet reflection.

I may not be perfect, but I’m learning to love myself more fully each day. I’m still dreaming about my future, still working toward building my home in the Philippines, and still discovering who I’m becoming.

Right now, I’m exactly where I need to be.

Thank you for watching, reading, and growing with me.

Be kind to yourself today.
Be amazing.
And remember—it’s a beautiful day to be gorgeous. ✨
March 4, 2026 — Back to Routine, Back to Myself

06.03.2026

Good morning everyone.

Today is March 4th, 2026, and it’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous, stunning, amazing, and kind.

This morning started with me waiting for my Waymo ride to work. The air in San Francisco felt colder than I remembered — probably because I just returned from the Philippines where the weather was warm and forgiving. There, I rarely needed a sweater. Here, the crisp morning air quickly reminded me that I was back.

Back to routine.
Back to work.
Back to reality.

As the car pulled up, I laughed to myself and said, “Hey Jasmine, we’re back.”

Even though it’s only been a short time since returning, stepping back into my daily routine feels like re-entering a familiar rhythm. There’s something comforting about it, even if I’m still adjusting to the jet lag and the shift in pace.

Gratitude for 13,000 Views

Something really exciting happened yesterday.

One of my yoga videos reached 13,000 views just two days after posting. What makes this even more meaningful is that I didn’t spend money on ads — people are simply finding the video and watching it organically.

That tells me something.

Maybe people really connect with the workout and yoga videos. Maybe they resonate with the idea of movement as a form of healing.

So I’m thinking of leaning into that more.
More yoga sessions.
More wellness content.
More sharing of the journey.

I’m also planning to join a gym soon. There’s actually a climbing gym near my place called Mission Cliffs, and every time I pass by it I think about committing to a more consistent fitness routine. I haven’t officially signed up yet because I’ll be traveling to San Diego soon to drop off my mom and pick up my dog — but hopefully by next week, I’ll make that commitment.

One small step toward taking care of myself.

When Your Story Reaches Someone

Yesterday I received a message on Instagram that genuinely melted my heart.

Someone who watched my videos wrote to me saying they were also a nurse practitioner and that my content about self-care and prioritizing mental health really resonated with them. They shared their experience of burnout — the emotional weight of patient care, documentation demands, productivity expectations — and how my transparency reminded them that they weren’t alone.

Reading that message made everything feel worth it.

I started sharing these videos partly as a way to process my own healing journey, but also because I never wanted someone else to feel like they had to carry their struggles alone.

Healthcare can feel isolating sometimes.
Especially when you’re new.

And if sharing my journey helps even one person feel understood, then that’s already meaningful.

Realizing My Own Impostor Syndrome

Something else I realized recently while reflecting on that message was this: I might actually have impostor syndrome, even if it doesn’t look the way people typically describe it.

For a long time, I never labeled it that way. But when I slowed down and allowed myself to reflect, I began noticing patterns.

Sometimes I feel like I constantly have to prove myself.
Sometimes I feel anxious at work, as if I’m being watched or evaluated every moment.

It’s subtle, but it’s there.

Part of that feeling may come from something someone once told me — a partner from the past who said I was the dumbest person they had ever met. At the time, I brushed it off and told myself they were joking. But deep down, those words stayed with me.

It’s strange how certain comments linger in your mind long after the moment passes.

But healing means learning something important:

Other people’s opinions are not the truth about who you are.

I don’t have to prove my intelligence.
I don’t have to prove my worth.

I know I’m still learning. I’m a new nurse practitioner, and that means growth is part of the process. Expecting myself to know everything would be impossible — unless I were some kind of supercomputer.

And I’m not.

I’m human.
And humans learn.

Lunchtime Diaries: A Small Moment of Joy

Later in the day, I filmed a quick lunchtime diary.

I wasn’t very hungry, but I had some shrimp curry that I cooked a few days ago, so I ate a few bites while chatting with the camera. Then I did something fun: I unboxed my first Labubu figure.

Apparently you can get different characters representing things like love, hope, serenity, luck, happiness, and loyalty.

When I opened the box, guess what I got?

Happiness.

Not the limited edition figure — but honestly, it felt perfect.

The color was even my favorite.

It felt symbolic somehow. After everything I’ve gone through recently, after the introspection and healing during my trip to the Philippines, pulling the Happiness figure felt like a small affirmation.

Like the universe saying:

You’re on the right path.

So of course I clipped it onto my bag.

A tiny reminder that happiness is something I’m actively choosing.

Rethinking My Career Path

I also spent some time reflecting on a decision I made recently.

I had applied for an anesthesia program and was scheduled for an interview. But yesterday I decided to pause and reschedule instead of moving forward right away.

Why?

Because I realized something important: right now, I actually love my current role as a nurse practitioner in primary care.

I love the patient population I serve.
I love the sense of purpose it gives me.

So part of me wonders if I applied to that program simply because I wanted an escape route — another option in case things became overwhelming.

But instead of rushing into a major decision, I’m giving myself time to reflect.

Maybe anesthesia is right for me.
Maybe it isn’t.

And that’s okay.

Sometimes clarity comes from slowing down.

Ending the Day With Intention

By the afternoon, I managed to fit in a few moments of stretching and meditation, even though the environment wasn’t perfectly quiet. Sometimes you just work with what you have.

On the way home, I felt tired — jet lag is still catching up to me — but I also felt proud that I managed to return to routine and still carve out time for reflection.

I’m trying to build a healthier version of myself.

More yoga.
More walking.
More mindfulness.

I’m even considering walking to and from work when the weather allows it. It would be good for my health and a nice way to reconnect with the city.

And yes — I also have a Hawaii trip coming up, which is extra motivation to get back into shape.

Two weeks of consistency.
Two weeks of movement.
Two weeks of showing up for myself.

A Beautiful Reminder

As I looked around on my walk outside today, I realized something simple but powerful.

Life is happening right now.

The park near my workplace.
The San Francisco streets.
The quiet moments between responsibilities.

These small moments are part of the journey too.

So if you’ve been watching my videos, supporting my content, or simply following along silently — thank you.

There may not be thousands of you yet, but the few who are here truly matter.

And if my story reminds you that you’re not alone in your struggles, then sharing it will always be worth it.

Here’s to healing.
Here’s to growth.
And here’s to choosing happiness.

— Jasmine 🌿
March 2, 2026 — Back to Reality, Back to Routine

04.03.2026
Good morning.
Today is March 2, 2026 — and it’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous, stunning, amazing.

And also… slightly bloated.

Today is my first day back at work in San Francisco.

I tried on my regular scrubs this morning and — wow. Tight. Like why are we fighting for our lives in this fabric tight. I definitely gained weight during the Philippines trip. And I knew it. I felt it. But nothing humbles you like scrubs that used to fit comfortably.

So yes. We are signing up for the gym.
Yes. We are watching what we eat.
Yes. We are back to routine.

But here’s the difference: I’m not spiraling. I’m not shaming myself. I’m just… aware.

Jetlag, Shrimp Curry & 20 Patients

I got home around 8:00–8:30 p.m. last night. Instead of unpacking like a responsible adult, I cooked. I had frozen vegetables and frozen shrimp, so I made shrimp vegetable curry for lunch today.

Jetlag is no joke. I barely slept. My body still thinks it’s in Asia. I’m thirsty. I’m exhausted. And I have 20 patients scheduled — the most I’ve ever seen in one day.

But I signed up for this.

Driving through San Francisco this morning felt surreal. The air is colder. The energy is faster. The province still lingers in my bones — slower mornings, softer sounds.

Now it’s back to Venmo routines. Calendar blocks. Inbox zero. Clinical mode.

And yet, I felt grounded.

Last night, being back with my partner — feeling loved — reminded me that I’m not doing this alone. That stability matters. That softness exists even in busy seasons.

I Survived

It’s the end of the day now.

And I survived.

Jetlag.
Twenty patients.
Full schedule.
No lunchtime diary because I was running nonstop.

But I made it.

And I need to say this out loud: I am really lucky. My staff. My co-workers. The system I work in. It’s not perfect — but it’s supportive. And today proved that I can handle more than I think.

I’m exhausted. The kind of exhaustion that settles behind your eyes. I’m going to sleep early tonight.

But first… pizza.

Pizza Therapy & Real-Life Conversations

We used a sourdough starter pizza kit — $10 for three pieces. Is it worth it? Debatable. It’s basically flour, sauce, and convenience. But tonight wasn’t about perfection. It was about ease.

Life is easier when you make it easier.

We made two pizzas:
- Hawaiian (yes, ham and pineapple — don’t fight me)
- Mushroom and ham
My mom was half-asleep. My partner was teasing me about making my own dough next time. We talked about rugs, Costco, Amazon returns, and random household things that somehow feel intimate when you’re tired and together in the kitchen.

Simple domestic moments.

And honestly? That’s the soft life.

We laughed. We debated cheese amounts. We waited for it to cool down. We burned our tongues anyway.

It tasted amazing.

Health Without Hate

Yes, I gained weight.

Yes, I need to get back into the gym.

Yes, my cheeks look fuller.

But here’s what I’m not doing:
- I’m not calling myself ugly.
- I’m not punishing myself.
- I’m not undoing the joy I experienced in the Philippines.
I gained weight because I was happy. Because I let myself eat. Because I was healing.

Now I’ll lose weight because I love my body — not because I hate it.

There’s a difference.

New Beginnings

We also got approved for a new place.

We met the landlord. She was warm. She brought pastries. The neighborhood felt right — beautiful architecture, walkable streets, that feeling of home when you don’t even live there yet.

I can’t wait to decorate. To build a space that reflects this version of me.

Grounded.
Healing.
Jetlagged — but steady.

Today was proof.

Proof that I can come back from softness and still perform.
Proof that I can face tight scrubs without shame.
Proof that growth doesn’t disappear when vacation ends.

March 2, 2026.

Back to San Francisco.
Back to responsibility.
Back to routine.

And still — another beautiful day to be gorgeous.
March 1, 2026 — On Leaving, On Healing, On Becoming

03.03.2026

Good morning.
It’s March 1, 2026 — and it’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous, stunning, amazing, kind.

We are on our way to the airport. Our flight back to California is at 11:00 a.m., and this is our last morning in the Philippines.

The Alley That Raised Me

Here’s the small alley base where we’ve been staying in the province. It’s crowded. Tight. Full of life.

Motorcycles squeezing through. Neighbors already awake. Roosters somewhere in the background. The kind of morning that doesn’t rush — it simply unfolds.

This is the simple life.
Simple mornings.
Simple routines.

And yet, somehow, it holds so much depth.

As we drive out to the highway toward TPLEX, I look at the houses — some newly painted, some still in progress — and I can’t help but dream. We talk about building our own house in Buba one day. Somewhere with more space. More nature. More peace.

A soft life. A grounded life.

Maybe one day I’ll move back and live that single, peaceful province life.

I’m going to miss you, Philippines.

Clark Airport Reflections

We made it to Clark International Airport, and we’re at the Marhaba Lounge having a quick salad before our flight back to San Francisco.

Trying to be healthy.
Trying to be balanced.
Trying to be in moderation.

I know I gained weight during this trip. And for the first time in my life, I’m not ashamed of it.

Because what made me gain weight?

Joy.
Family.
Late-night conversations.
Ginataang anything.
Rice.
Soup.
Free lounge food.

I surrendered to what made me happy.

Food has always been one of my love languages. And this trip? I let myself enjoy it.

Now I’m here eating what tastes like a vegetable ceviche — cucumber, cilantro, fresh, bright. Two spoonfuls of tomato soup because moderation, accountability, growth.

I even told myself I’d go back to this entry when I start working out again.

Growth doesn’t mean punishment.
It means awareness.

Taking Back My Story

While I was here in the Philippines, I posted a few reels about my healing journey.

And part of healing is ownership.

Almost ten years ago, in New Orleans, I drank too much. I blacked out. I was around people I thought were safe. It was “fun and games” at the time — but in truth, I was running.

Running from sadness.
Running from fear.
Running from parts of myself I didn’t want to face.

Drinking became escape.
Partying became anesthesia.

For years, whispers followed that story. And the shame stayed alive because I let other people narrate it.

But here’s the shift:

I told it myself.

Not to glamorize it.
Not to excuse it.
But to reclaim it.

That was the old Jazz.
The one running away.
The one drowning out her thoughts with noise.

This is the new Jazz.
Grounded.
Facing things head-on.
Not perfect — but present.

Healing isn’t pretending it didn’t happen.
Healing is saying: It happened. And I’m still here.

Taipei: Waiting, Thinking, Moving Forward

We’re now at Taiwan Taoyuan International Airport, waiting for our 11:00 p.m. flight back to San Francisco.

My mom is napping beside me. I found a quiet corner to whisper these thoughts into existence.

Something else happened yesterday.

A friend from college finally responded after months of silence. He said he’s not in a space to make room right now.

And you know what?

That gave me peace.

Because clarity is kinder than ghosting.
Truth is softer than imagination.

The overthinker in me always fills silence with worst-case scenarios. But this time, I didn’t have to guess. I got an answer.

I responded right away — because I’m practicing not mirroring the behaviors that hurt me.

That’s growth too.

Back to San Francisco

Tomorrow, I go back to work in California.

Twenty patients scheduled.
Inbox cleared.
Interview on Tuesday.
Options open.

I’m nervous.

But I’m also different.

This trip shifted something. I’m not fully healed — but I’m closer. An inch closer. A step closer. And maybe that’s enough.

We are always where we need to be.
Even if we’re not yet where we want to be.

Filipina. Sweet. Tastefully Crazy.

I said it as a joke — but maybe it’s my truth.

Filipina.
Sweet.
Tastefully crazy.

Crazy enough to feel deeply.
Crazy enough to heal out loud.
Crazy enough to believe in soft lives and second chances and vegetable ceviche revelations.

This is Volume Two.
Healing Journey — California Edition.

We’re not done.
We’re just getting started.

Have a beautiful day.
And remember — it’s another beautiful day to be gorgeous.
Choosing Health, Choosing Me 🇵🇭

01.03.2026
Good afternoon from the Philippines

Hi everyone. Good afternoon.

Today I’m moving my body — slowly, imperfectly, but intentionally. I’ve been reflecting on my health lately. Over the past couple of months, I’ve gained about 10–15 pounds. Even before arriving in the Philippines for my healing journey, I had already gained weight, and I know my eating habits and portion sizes played a role.

But this reflection isn’t about shame — it’s about awareness.

Now that I have a better outlook on life, now that I truly see life as something beautiful that I want more of, I realize how important it is to prioritize my health. I want to live longer. I want to feel stronger. I want to fully enjoy this life I fought so hard to love.

Choosing myself doesn’t stop at emotional healing — it includes physical and mental wellness too.

Starting Where I Am

Today’s workout started with simple stretching — the kind you’ve seen me do before. From there, I tried to ease back into yoga poses I learned over the years. It’s been a while, and honestly, I felt awkward and out of practice. I forgot sequences. I laughed at myself. I sweat within minutes.

And you know what? That’s okay.

I am giving myself kindness and grace.

This journey isn’t about perfection. It’s about showing up.

Sometimes I kneel and stretch.
Sometimes I pause because I forgot what comes next.
Sometimes I just breathe and feel grateful that my body can still move.

Ten minutes in, I was already sweating — and it felt amazing.

Looking Ahead: Building Strength & Dreams

When I return to San Francisco, I plan to go back to the gym to build on what I know and strengthen my practice. One of my long-term goals is to become a yoga instructor — not because I’m perfect at it, but because yoga has helped me reconnect with my body, my breath, and my healing.

Another dream close to my heart is building a yoga retreat bed and breakfast in Tobalan. Lately, I’ve been watching videos about house building and property investment, and I’m realizing that the smartest step for me right now is to build a home here in the Philippines — something within my means — rather than taking on large loans in the U.S.

So the plan is simple:
- Build my home in the Philippines first
- Create a foundation for my retreat dream
- Save toward owning a home in the U.S. later
Slow, intentional steps. No rushing. No comparison.

Healing Includes the Body Too

For a long time, my healing focused on emotional survival. Now, it’s about thriving — physically, mentally, and spiritually.

I’m learning that:
- Health is self-respect
- Movement is gratitude
- Rest is necessary
- Grace is part of growth
Life is beautiful — even with obstacles. Especially with obstacles. They remind me that I am alive, evolving, and capable of becoming a better version of myself.

Thank You for Being Here

Thank you for watching me stretch, sweat, laugh at myself, and try again.
Thank you for witnessing my growth in real time.

Hopefully I get better at yoga — and even if I don’t, I’ll still show up.

If you’re on your own journey, let this be your reminder:
Start where you are. Be kind to yourself. Keep going.

Life is beautiful. Let’s live it fully.

With gratitude,
@inspireauthenticliving
Filipina Nurse Practitioner Diaries
Health • Wellness • Good Vibes • Positivity